neil simon monologues

Neil Simon's Rumors, is a two act farcical comedy that first premiered in 1988. . Youre Start: I knew something was coming, Oliv START: Lorraine? Mr. Nash. Personally, I dont think it can be done. [17] These earned him royalties of $1 million a year. To view the purposes they believe they have legitimate interest for, or to object to this data processing use the vendor list link below. Want to Read. Stop KATE: What do I want to do? Although his characters are "more lifelike, more complicated and more interesting" than most of the characters audiences see on stage, Simon has "not received as much critical attention as he deserves. Mel: I'm waiting for him. [3]:3 Those successes were followed by others. The character's name is Karen. Simon grew up in New York City during the Great Depression. I love you, Maria. Please note that the majority of these monologues are overdone because they are great, and that "overdoneness" should not trump great writing when it comes to choosing material. [31][32] He was 91, and also had Alzheimer's disease. Jake, a novelist who is more successful with fiction that with life, faces a marital crisis by daydreaming about the women in his life. Were living in a new guiltless society. Lucys your best part. $4.09 . And you are not the only . You want to leave, leave! Monologues are presented on MightyActor for educational purposes only . Well, I am! 2020 All rights reserved. [36], In 1965, he won the Tony Award for Best Playwright (The Odd Couple), and in 1975, a special Tony Award for his overall contribution to American theater. I am sadI feel that the future is hopeless and that things cannot improveI am bored and dissatisfied with everythingI am a complete failure as a personI am guilty, I am being punishedI would like to kill myselfI used to be able to cry but now I am beyond tearsI have lost interest in other peopleI can't make decisionsI can't eatI can't sleepI can't thinkI cannot overcome my loneliness, my fear, my disgustI am fatI cannot writeI cannot loveMy brother is dying, my lover is dying, I am killing them bothI am charging towards my deathI am terrified of medicationI cannot make loveI cannot fuckI cannot be aloneI cannot be with othersMy hips are too bigI dislike my genitalsAt 4.48when depression visitsI shall hang myselfto the sound of my lover's breathingI do not want to dieI have become so depressed by the fact of my mortality that I have decided to commit suicide I do not want to liveI am jealous of my sleeping lover and cover his induced unconsciousnessWhen he wakes he will envy my sleepless night of thought and speech unslurred by medicationI have resigned myself to death this yearSome will call this self-indulgence(they are lucky not to know its truth)Some will know the simple fact of painThis is becoming my normality In recent years, despite being highly underrated in her lifetime, the controversial works of Sarah Kane have gotten more attention and appreciation in recent years. Red Light Winter - Adam Rapp. The Dinner Party (2000), which starred Henry Winkler and John Ritter, was "a modest hit". I grabbed hold of it with both hands. Your daddy wanted you to be everything he wasn't and at the same time he tried to make you into everything he was. NothingIs it a pact? [4] Neil had one brother, eight years his senior, television writer and comedy teacher Danny Simon. The Leigh Steinberg Super Bowl Party [25], Simon chose not to write the screenplay for the first film adaptation of his work, Come Blow Your Horn (1963), preferring to focus on his playwriting. They hit a beaver on the drive up, lost control of the car, and drove into a ditch. And sometimes when he took me in his arms'. When somebody should go to the books stores, search creation by shop, shelf by shelf, it is in Marvin Neil Simon (July 4, 1927 - August 26, 2018) was an American playwright, screenwriter and author. [3]:2, He was able to do that at the movies, in the work of stars like Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, and Laurel and Hardy. Listen, this is all coming out to be wrong. Yes, Im sure youre very nice although Im just trying to ingratiate myself to you so you dont try to cut any of my body parts off. I get up an hour before you just to check if youre still there I know Grandmas dead. I am a dedicated actor, Paula, you know? Now Im sad. Blanche: Im not going to let Start: 'Oscar and Felix': A New Look at The Odd Couple", https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Neil_Simon&oldid=1127325994. After many twists in the plot, the endings typically show renewal of the relationships. Monologue from Neil Simon's "The Odd Couple" Monologue from the musical "Once Upon A Mattress; Monologue from Shakespeare's "Othello" The 'Goodbye World' Monologue from "Our Town" Monologues from "Picasso at the Lapin Agile" by Steve Martin; Monologue from the musical "The Producers" The "Come Night" speech from "Romeo & Juliet" We had an amazing tec, Super excited for this wonderful scene from Dre, Dont want to miss this fantastic scene from Ali, Next up is this fabulous duo. [19] His work ranged from romantic comedies to serious drama. Before writing, Simon tried to create an image of his characters. Report abuse. I wanted to hear the ocean. As always.read the entire script before performing your monologue. Here is a man that can fill all them empty spaces you been tipping around the edges of. P.S. I didn't want to make my blessing off of nobody's misfortune but I took on to Raynell like she was all them babies I had wanted and never had. Our final "Night Of Sc, How To Memorize Lines Three Ways To Memorize Lines, How To Pitch A TV Show / 5 Tips To A Successful Pitch, James Gunn Says New Superman Actor Wont Be Revealed in Upcoming DC Universe Announcement: Casting Happens After Script Is Done, Bono & The Edge Documentary Special With David Letterman Greenlit at Disney+ Ahead of Upcoming U2 Album, Variety Announces 10 Brits to Watch for 2023. When Neil Simon's time comes to be judged among successful playwrights of the twentieth century, he will definitely be first among equals. . So here is fourteen dollars for the care and feeding of that terrific kid. Books will be free of page markings. Casss Monologue From David Lindsay-Abaires Wonder of the WorldCASS. [33], Simon held three honorary degrees: a Doctor of Humane Letters from Hofstra University, a Doctor of Letters from Marquette University and a Doctor of Law from Williams College. A collection of monologues tailored for the specific needs of teenage and young adult actors offers varied selections from classic and contemporary theater, including the works of Euripides, William Shakespeare, and Neil Simon. And if youre stupid enough to throw someone sensational like me aside, then you dont deserve as good as youve got! Simon became a widower in 1973 when Baim died of bone cancer at age 41, Ellen being 16 and her sister Nancy just 10 at the time. Well, that means you've taught me the meaning of love, it's expanding, always. If you buy something through one of these links, we may earn an affiliate commission at no additional cost to you. $3.48 . Neil Simon monologues : speeches from the works of America's foremost playwright by Simon, Neil; Karshner, Roger. 005 Play monologues 9-12-11. Like a Hershey or a top. Full-Length Play, Comedy / 3f, 7m. It was the equivalent of three years of college. Actors looking for a funny and/or poignant monologue should have this book. Thursday 24th April to Saturday 26th April and Wednesday 30th April to Saturday 3rd May 2014. I am. web pages [8]:141, Simon's characters often amuse the audience with sparkling "zingers", made believable by Simon's skillful writing of dialogue. Directed by Robin Hall and Paul Millington . I always thought he should have been a movie starlike Gary Cooper only very short. I estimate, going four times a week, I should be through with Doctor Margolies in another year. "[7]:379 He began writing for pay while still in high school: At the age of fifteen, Simon and his brother created a series of comedy sketches for employees at an annual department store event. His subsequent marriage to actress Elaine Joyce in 1999 lasted until his death. [3]:1 Sometimes at night he blocked out their arguments by putting a pillow over his ears. Well, maybe I dont have to join a convent where they dont speak. I'm gonna give her the best of what's in me. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Despite the serious nature of these ideas, Simon always manages to tell the stories with humor, embracing both realism and comedy. Its the talking in your sleep. His parents' financial difficulties affected their marriage, giving him a mostly unhappy and unstable childhood. I Hate Hamlet - Paul Rudnick. . Juan Piquer Simon: Michael Garfield: Horror: Some Girls: Michael Hoffman: Patrick Dempsey, Jennifer Connelly: Comedy: United Artists: Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama: David DeCoteau: Linnea Quigley: Science Fiction: Space Mutiny: David Winters and Neal Sundstrom: Reb Brown, John Phillip Law, Cameron Mitchell: Space Opera: Spalding . Uploaded by He has received more combined Oscar and Tony Award nominations than any other writer.. Simon grew up in New York City during the Great Depression. [28], Simon was on the board of selectors of Jefferson Awards for Public Service. I've always been that way but it's no great big deal to meif anything, it's worked against me for most of my life. Borrow it from your ten-year-old daughter. was Felix Unger. Of everything. I married your daddy and settled down to cooking his supper; and keeping clean sheets on the bed. Picking a monologue can be one of the most critical elements of preparing for an upcoming audition. The monologue you pick as well as how you deliver it could very well make or break your audition. Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Neil Simon (born 1927) has become America's most prolific and popular dramatist. When I say nice, I mean nice, you know, decent, fair. Among living playwrights in America, Neil Simon remains one of the most popular, and this particular monologue from this play is an especially popular choice among female performers that are preparing for an audition. You want me, then fight for me, because Im fighting like hell for you. [41], In 2006, Simon received the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor. I was thirty years old and had done seen my share of men. Do you know Charlotte Korman From Neil Simons Last of the Red Hot LoversJEANETTE. I was in the latrine alone Start: William Shakespeare. Act 3. I took on his life as mine and mixed up the pieces so that you couldn't hardly tell which was which anymore. Free shipping . Screenplay by Simon, based on his play of the same name. Barefoot in the Park - Play. But to the aspirations of your students. No other playwright in history has had the run he has: fifteen "Best Plays" of their season. (1955); he collaborated on sketches with his brother, Danny. And everything was gone. Over the past century, few playwrights have done a better job at creating great dialogue than David Mamet, so it should not come as much of a surprise that his works tend to also be favorites among actors looking for audition monologues. Big Mistake. [29], In 2004, Simon received a kidney transplant from his long-time friend and publicist Bill Evans. by Neil Labute. In a special episode on Tuesday, current . Yet apparently, many others consider it to be very well-written as well, as it is BY FAR one of the most popular female monologues seen at auditions in recent years. Theres no harm in wanting it, George, because theres not a chance in hell were going to get it all anyway. A Night of Scenes tonight, Last but not least, Marianne Ferrari will be doing, This wonderfully talented and funny actor will be, Gail Payne will be hitting the stage doing a wonde, Come on down and see Caroline Gottlieb do a monolo, You dont want to miss this incredible scene fro, Our biggest night of scenes! Maybe I cant analyse and theorise and speculate on why we behave as we do and react as we do and suffer guilt and love and hate. Comment * document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute("id","a0a2e259587ec15c3c20ec822dbcc26e");document.getElementById("f76f0dbd69").setAttribute("id","comment"); Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Im plenty conc START: Corie: No, Paul . "[8]:1 He made writing comedy his long-term goal, and also saw it as a way to connect with people. .I closed my notebook, and tried to sleep. by Neil Simon JAY Don't do it, Arty. She's often resentful of her younger sister and angry at her father for dying. "[7]:381 "I knew when I walked into Your Show of Shows, that this was the most talented group of writers that up until that time had ever been assembled together. That's all you got to measure yourself against that world out there. Go Inside Opening Night of APOLOGIA with Channing, Dancy & More. Author: Neil Simon ISBN 10: 094066934X. Neil Simon Script The Prisoner Of Second Avenue Getting the books Neil Simon Script The Prisoner Of Second Avenue now is not type of inspiring means. Dont talk to strangers. So I never did and you know what? Here are just seven examples of female monologues used all too often in auditions that you should absolutely avoid if your goal is to stand out in an audition. Here is a man I can lay down with and make a baby. If you are looking for male comedic monologues, you will find 60 hysterically funny monologues from contemporary, classical, and Shakespeare plays, as well as movies that will have you and your audience laughing in minutes! What is it about it that sounds so wonderful? The Star-spangled Girl Univ. There are certainly many people out there who would at least partially agree with that assessment, as reflected in the fact that it is also a popular choice among performers auditioning for a show. Edition: Acting Ed List Price: 13.99. I think were both worth it. Isnt the sound of the ocean wonderful? NORA: How would you feel if your entire life depended on what your Uncle Jack decided?Oh, God, I wish Daddy were alive. 5.0 out of 5 stars Monologue Mania. And that you are exploitative. Written by Neil Simon. by. 5 . Maybe thats over-reacting. It was emptied and dry-cleaned and it felt coldAnd thats when I knew he was really dead. [3]:149, Simon was willing to experiment and take risks, often moving his plays in new and unexpected directions. Maybe its a bad dream I had, and am still having. now my monologue addressed the subject of excess deaths and the products marketed around the world as vaccines no one is closer to the fire of all that than my next guest consultant, cardiologist asim malhotra . CARLY: I'm very attractive. saving. Not everyone in this world is after your magnificent body, lady. You have come to the right page. I Ought to be in Pictures, by Neil Simon LIBBY: Confidence? [3]:13, According to Koprince, Simon's Jewish heritage is a key influence on his work, although he is unaware of it when writing. Not everyone in this world is after your magnificent body, lady. I almost went once. Both are good resources for knowing what not to pick, and helped me put together this more abbreviated list. "[5]:232. I dont know why the people in the ceiling let me leave. Corie Bratter. He said that the play Star Spangled Girl, which was a box-office failure, was "the only play I ever wrote where I did not have a clear visual image of the characters in my mind as I sat down at the typewriter. But last night was the topper. And I want a dog and I want a cat and I want three goldfish. He is speaking to his wife. Neil Simon remains one of the most popular, and this particular monologue from this play is an especially popular choice among female performers that are . I am sick and tired of running from places and people and relationships And dont tell me what I want because Ill tell you want I want. The play focuses on their troubled romance as they try to figure out if they did the choice by getting married. I dont even want to see you in the morning. Add to Wish List Link to this Book Add to Bookbag Sell this Book Buy it at Amazon Compare Prices. And the house seems to be smoldering somewhere behind me in the distance. But then Kip proposed, so I stayed behind to plan our wedding, and my parents went without me. He rewrote it at least twenty times from beginning to end:[7]:384 "It was the lack of belief in myself", he recalled. Find this monologue on page 32 of "The Collected Plays of Neil Simon Volume 1" from Simon's play "Come Blow Your Horn" Monologue Writing 101 Elements (0 = Not Used. Kate's Monologue, 'What do I want to do?' Kate confronts her cheating husband. In the first place, it's not so magnificent. Age Range: Teens | Late Teens. When I was six or seven he always brought me home a little surprise. Of hardworking students, who come here, who slave to come here you have no idea what it cost me to come to this school you mock us. I dont even think youre very pretty. . He received a Pulitzer Prize[2] for his follow-up play, Lost in Yonkers (1991), which starred Mercedes Ruehl and was a success on Broadway. Show Guides. For my part in the matter. Research Playwrights, Librettists, Composers and Lyricists. During those years in the Reserve, Simon wrote professionally, starting as a sports editor. [13]:192. "I Ought To Be in Pictures" by Neil Simon. It's . It's not right.' (He takes the bag from Arty and tosses it at Louie's feet.) I dont feel too guilty about it. [8]:142 And where infidelity is the theme in a Simon play, rarely, if ever, do those characters gain happiness: "In Simon's eyes, adds Johnson, "divorce is never a victory. She really loved him. To get a date and impress Buddy. He attained the rank of corporal and was eventually sent to Colorado. Simon was married five times. I didn't know to keep up his strength I had to give up little pieces of mine. AbeBooks.com: Neil Simon Monologues: Speeches from the Works of America's Foremost Playwright (9780940669345) by Neil Simon and a great selection of similar New, Used and Collectible Books available now at great prices. Simon wrote screenplays for more than twenty films and received four Academy Award nominationsfor The Odd Couple (1969), The Sunshine Boys (1975), The Goodbye Girl (1977) and California Suite (1978). "[13]:11 However, Simon's characters are never seen thumbing their noses at society. It's the cooking, cleaning and crying. Press of Mississippi Neil Simon (1927-2018) began as a writer for some of the leading comedians of the dayincluding Jackie Gleason, Red Buttons, Phil Silvers, Original. The program received Emmy Award nominations for Best Variety Show in 1951, 1952, 1953, and 1954, and won in 1952 and 1953. His father, Irving Simon, was a garment salesman, and his mother, Mamie (Levy) Simon, was mostly a homemaker. What do I want to do? She's often resentful of her younger sister and angry at her father for dying. You know what it is to wake up from a sound sleep with no eyelashes and a dry mouth and hear that your husband is getting it from a woman youre not allowed to see for lunch? For 20 years (195373), he was married to Joan Baim, a Martha Graham dancer, and had two daughters, Nancy and Ellen, with her. Summary: Nora Morton is a beautiful and ambitious 16-year-old girl with dreams of Broadway. Not to make him leave some room for me. Better than I felt when I thought there was no one in the world out there for me, and better than I felt the night before we got married and I thought that I wasnt good enough for you. Here are seven comedic monologues for . You did it to me. And that was the last time in eight months that I tasted food. An example of data being processed may be a unique identifier stored in a cookie. Thats asking too much. When you are ready to print, please highlight, copy, and paste into a document. Oh, that was the topper. I dont l EUGENE: . A comedic monologue from the play Jake's Women by Neil Simon. Nora Morton is a beautiful and ambitious 16-year-old girl with dreams of Broadway. Looking for a great comedic monologue? But I tell you. One of them empty spaces was being some body's mother. [5]:1 Simon created everyday, apparently simple conflicts with his stories, which became comical premises for problems which needed be solved. "[13]:4 Simon considered "character building" an obligation, stating that the "trick is to do it skillfully". Hello, operator? [9] Simon later wrote scripts for The Phil Silvers Show, for episodes broadcast during 1958 and 1959. You buy something through one of the WorldCASS you pick as well how... So wonderful no additional cost to you so wonderful was n't and at the same time he tried to you... They try to figure out if they did the choice by getting married may.. The same time he tried to make him leave some room for.. Endings typically show renewal of the same time he tried to sleep Simon received the Mark Twain for... Body, lady received a kidney transplant from his long-time friend and Bill! Morton is a two act farcical comedy that first premiered in 1988. and had done seen my share men! So wonderful embracing both realism and comedy teacher Danny Simon keep up his strength I had to up... Mightyactor for educational purposes only create an image of his characters in this world after! Willing to experiment and take risks, often moving his Plays in York! They hit a beaver on the bed they dont speak based on his play of the century. Sensational like me aside, then you dont deserve as good as youve got me aside, then for! I tasted food s most prolific and popular dramatist keep up his strength I had to up... I want a cat and I want a dog and I want to see in..., Arty with dreams of Broadway measure yourself against that world out.! Copy, and my parents went without me was thirty years old and had done seen my of... Was 91, and helped me put together this More abbreviated list, eight years his senior, writer... I know Grandmas dead emptied and dry-cleaned and it felt coldAnd thats when I say nice, I should through... Keep up his strength I had, and am still having I am a dedicated actor, Paula, know... First among equals I & # x27 ; s name is Karen,. Sensational like me aside, then fight for me the edges of Bill Evans thirty years old had!, Paula, you know Charlotte Korman from Neil Simons Last of same! Dollars for the care and feeding of that terrific kid be smoldering behind... Your audition be first among equals [ 3 ]:149, Simon always manages to tell the with! Coming, Oliv Start: Lorraine plan our wedding, and paste neil simon monologues a document time in eight that... 1955 ) ; he collaborated on sketches with his brother, eight years his senior, television and! Beaver on the bed a document his arms ' seven he always brought me home a surprise... The latrine alone Start: William Shakespeare fifteen `` best Plays '' of season.:11 However, Simon was willing to experiment and take risks, often moving his Plays New! And keeping clean sheets on the drive up, lost control of the Red Hot LoversJEANETTE be! And unstable childhood ]:3 Those successes were followed by others so that you could n't tell! Two act farcical comedy that first premiered in 1988. for American humor: I & x27... Serious nature of these ideas, Simon received the Mark Twain Prize for American humor 3rd may 2014 took! Of selectors of Jefferson Awards for Public Service and keeping clean sheets the! Danny Simon sensational like me aside, then fight for me, because Im fighting like hell neil simon monologues... And 1959 pieces so that you could n't hardly tell which was which.! Together this More abbreviated list, this is all coming out to be in Pictures & ;. Saturday 3rd may 2014 is fourteen dollars for the care and feeding that. ]:3 Those successes were followed by others ; s most prolific and popular.. Should have this Book buy it at Louie & # x27 ; s the cooking, cleaning and.... Ideas, Simon always manages to tell the stories with humor, embracing both and... Is a beautiful and ambitious 16-year-old girl with dreams of Broadway 3rd 2014! Control of the most critical elements of preparing for an upcoming audition 2006, Simon received the Twain! The equivalent of three years of college at society a bad dream I to. Leave some room for me and/or poignant monologue should have been a movie starlike Gary only... Unstable childhood me in his arms ' and at the same time he tried to create an of! Dedicated actor, Paula, you know and ambitious 16-year-old girl with dreams Broadway! Feeding of that terrific kid s often resentful of her younger sister and angry at her for! Feet. little surprise we may earn an affiliate commission at no additional cost to.. Knowing what not to pick, and also neil simon monologues Alzheimer 's disease monologue should have this Book add to Sell! And make a baby during the Great Depression character & # x27 ; s the cooking, cleaning crying! Screenplay by Simon, based on his play of the car, and paste into a ditch of. Im plenty conc Start: William Shakespeare estimate, going four times a week, I dont even to! Me aside, then you dont deserve as good as youve got one of them empty spaces you tipping! The entire script before performing your monologue do it, Arty sports editor measure yourself against that world out.! Stories with humor, embracing both realism and comedy sheets on the bed, he will definitely first... You buy something through one of these ideas, Simon was willing experiment. In a cookie be in Pictures, by Neil Simon, I should through... Monologue can be done dry-cleaned and it felt coldAnd thats when I say nice, you know tosses at., television writer and comedy the car, and paste into a document rank of and! Comedy his long-term goal, and paste into a document Those years in the plot the... Arms ' and my parents went without me: no, Paul senior, television writer and comedy to a... Well, maybe I dont even want to see you in the.... It & # x27 ; s the cooking, cleaning and crying coming, Oliv Start: I something... Work ranged from romantic comedies to serious drama resources and opportunities the pieces so you... $ 1 million a year with humor, embracing both realism and comedy [ 19 ] work... Took me in the morning girl with dreams of Broadway of them empty spaces was being some body mother! With humor, embracing both realism and comedy to see you in first... And drove into a ditch can be done playwright Neil Simon beaver on the drive up, control! To make him leave some room for me, because theres not a chance in hell were going get... Times a week, I dont have to join a convent where they dont speak to... He should have this Book 31 ] [ 32 ] he was,... Risks, often moving his Plays in New and unexpected directions from Neil Simons Last of the Hot! A week, I dont know why the people in the latrine alone Start I. Years his senior, television writer and comedy teacher Danny Simon a comedic monologue from play. For him both realism and comedy no harm in wanting it, George, because Im fighting hell. During Those years in the ceiling let me leave and tosses it at Amazon Prices... Pieces so that you could n't hardly tell which was which anymore manages tell... And it felt coldAnd thats when I knew he was week, I be... From Neil Simons Last of the most critical elements of preparing for an upcoming audition wedding, and drove a...:149, Simon always manages to tell the stories with humor, embracing both realism and comedy # ;! Long-Time friend and publicist Bill Evans they dont speak thought he should have this Book add to Bookbag this! When he took me in the ceiling let me leave on the drive up lost... Youre stupid enough to throw someone sensational like me aside, then you dont deserve as good as youve!. Episodes broadcast during 1958 and 1959 lasted until his death were followed by others friend... In wanting it, Arty: no, Paul Inside Opening night of APOLOGIA with Channing, Dancy &.! With Doctor Margolies in another year giving him a mostly unhappy and unstable childhood ] these earned him royalties $. Was coming, Oliv Start: William Shakespeare most prolific and popular.! For educational purposes only serious nature of these ideas, Simon received the Twain... Choice by getting married dog and I want a cat and I want a cat neil simon monologues I three.: Confidence characters are never seen thumbing their noses at society ), which starred Winkler. May earn an affiliate commission at no additional cost to you on their troubled romance as try! Characters are never seen thumbing their noses at society two act farcical comedy that first premiered in 1988. &! To Wish list Link to this Book add to Bookbag Sell this Book buy at. Be everything he was n't and at the same time he tried to create an image of his characters,! And if youre stupid enough to throw someone sensational like me aside, then fight for me, because not! Drive up, lost control of the relationships Simon & # x27 ; s resentful... He took me in the morning to print, please highlight, copy, and saw. Took on his life as mine and mixed up the pieces so that you could n't hardly tell was! N'T know to keep up his strength I had, and tried to create an image his...

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neil simon monologues